There's a Way
I’m not a writer. I never pretended to be one. My father, mother, brother, and sister all got lost in the sauce reading, philosophizing, pontificating, and writing about politics and history and society. I don’t find these topics disinteresting, but never exciting enough to want to study it intensely for four years.
Instead I’d drown myself in mechanics and astronomy and eventually computers. I was obsessed with “why” do things work, and even better, how can I make them do what I want. The sound of keyboard “click clacks” were infinitely more gratifying than page-flipping shrieks. Studying the hard sciences and engineering - now that was something worth mortgaging my future financial soul for.
I’m not a great writer. I never really spent much time learning “how to”. But I can see far enough ahead to the intellectual battles that I, and my brother, are inevitably going to have to fight. Rather than bicker with the opposition about my credibility and upcoming (i.e. Elon’s emerald mine dilemma), I had the foresight to record all of my thoughts, opinions, and ideas now while I’m at my lowest. The irony with money, power, and status is that it lends you a voice, however that voice immediately becomes dismissed God forbid you adopt that might be beneficial to you because “well of course you say that, you have money, power and status!”. And so, I am forcing my self to write now to give my future self a saving grace, to have idea and feelings that are very much not to my benefit right now, and say “See? I’ve been saying this all along.”
My brother has already gotten a head start on this. He’s had his own substack since he’s graduated from college and has built an impressive library of hot takes and (sometimes radical) ideas. I admire his ability to not just say whatever he wants, but believe it with 110% conviction. Its Hamilton-esque.
I’m somewhat at rock bottom now. I studied astrophysics at a liberal arts college, and I’m pursuing a master’s for a job that has a decent starting salary. These are the on paper stats. In actuality, my major has little “practical” use. I’m grossly turned off by school, and yet I’m still slogging through the academic mud just to land six figures in debt. The job again is decent, but my real hope is to never have to go back.
I’m broke, my parents are essentially broke, and all paths on the traditional road lead to a fairly mediocre and disappointing 9-5 debt ridden life. I reject that reality. I will take risky bets on myself. I will bet the house. I will chase value, not money. I will build, not just manipulate. I will leave a mark on the world that is positive and tangible. I believe it is inevitable. And when it all happens, and I’ve been afforded a voice and I continue fighting the good fight, I’ll be able to point anyone back to here and say
“See? I’ve been saying this all along.”